Have you noticed that when outer forces beckon, it’s much easier to get things done?
That’s because life is much simpler than we make it for ourselves. Most people who come to me are a lot better at meeting other people’s deadlines than their own, for example.
That’s because very often we are trying to make something happen in isolation. Have you noticed how that tends not to work? Unless someone else is in on it and invested in some way, its easy not to notice time slipping away as you wander around the darkness of your own mind, which is the psychic equivalent of trying to cross Queens Boulevard blindfolded.
THAT, my friend, is not a risk worth taking.
And when it comes to the things that matter to you… trying to go it alone is that kind of risk. Because our minds make things a hell of a lot more complicated than they actually are.
Accomplishing a goal is deceptively simple. It just requires is a plan, and commitment. Take riding a bike. You need to find a safe patch of asphalt, a bicycle, and a willingness to fall. But most people don’t go about it by themselves. When we were young, most of us had someone to hold the back of the bike, cheer us on, and when we fell, make us get right back on and try again.
Now me, I tried to teach myself the ukelele for a minute. There are certainly plenty of resources out there to do it. But after fumbling around for a month I got frustrated and discouraged. Haven’t touched the thing since. But I know me. If I enroll in some lessons, I’ll get there because someone will be showing the way. (Plus, I’ll have skin in the game ‘cause I’ve paid them).
Think about your proudest accomplishments. Did you really make them happen completely on your own? Be honest. Did you have a plan of some kind? I’m willing to bet that you did.
Now think about the things that haven’t come to pass. What stopped, or is stopping you? What kind of support do you need?
When it comes to growth, life is simple: Connect with the people who can give you the support you need.
Don’t try to go it alone.