An acquaintance of mine is a famous stand up comedian.
Actually, I’m being coy. We were booty-call buddies ‘back in the day’.
Many years after our era, he hit the stratosphere.
A cousin who knew about that phase of my life spotted him at a casino in Las Vegas. He was killing some time between shows by plunking coins into a one-armed bandit. My relative approached him excitedly, exclaiming ‘you know my cousin Rahti!’
‘Rahti? Oh yeah. Isn’t she a life coach now?’
‘Yes!’ my cousin declared. To which my comedian/former friend-with-benefits demanded in his characteristic bombast:
‘WHAT THE HELL IS A LIFE COACH?’
Well, today I thought I’d answer that question by giving you five reasons why you may want to hire one.
You haven’t accomplished what you want in life yet, so you’re unhappy.
You’re coming to a coach for help figuring out what’s in your way. Maybe it’s a missing skill set, but chances are there are internal conflicts-of-interests you haven’t made conscious yet. These may reveal that you actually have exactly what you want, so to get the other thing you think you want, you have to get clearer about why you still want it. Once a coach helps you figure that out, you can come up with an action plan together.
You’ve accomplished what you want in life, and you’re still unhappy.
This is usually an instance of confusing a want with a need. Example: Confusing fame or recognition with the unconditional love of a parent. A therapist may help you make that distinction, but even if they do, they may not know how to help you do anything about in order to actually live happily. For that, you need coaching.
You are chronically disappointing yourself.
Most people are very good at keeping their word to others. They just don’t know how to show up for themselves. This is one of the best reasons to call a coach. A coach will help you develop ways to make follow-through on your own behalf possible, and much much easier.
There is something you know you want to do, or need to do, but you just won’t do it.
Again, here is where a therapist can help you understand your reasons for being stuck. But beyond that, a reason can become an excuse when it isn’t accompanied by a new way of looking at the situation. A coach is trained to help you reframe your challenges from problem-focus to a solution-focus. Willingness to shift to a solution-focus is central to being coachable, because you can’t find what you’re not looking for.
You have a great life. You’re happy and fulfilled. And you want more.
Some of my clients are very successful people who know they have much more to offer and much more potential to reach. These people know that life is not static. Nothing lasts. You either grow or die. And they love living too much for that. So they hire a coach for the same reason an athlete does: to play at the top of their game.
Recognize yourself in any of these reasons to hire a coach? Then let’s have a conversation! (And no, I’m not telling you who that comedian is.)
